I’m finally in therapy because my mum abandoned me as a kid – it’s helped me a lot, reveals The Son’s Hugh Jackman
WHENEVER the perfectly honed Hugh Jackman steps in front of the camera he flashes a confident smile.
But behind the dazzling grin, the Wolverine and Greatest Showman star has revealed he has visited a shrink to discuss his past.
The Aussie actor went to a therapist to help him come to terms with his early life and to improve the way he relates to his wife and two kids.
Hugh, 54, had a “traumatic” childhood, with his mum, Grace, suffering postnatal depression then leaving him to begin a new life in England when he was just eight.
And 18 months ago his “extraordinary” dad Christopher, who raised Hugh as a lone parent, died aged 84.
The actor opened up about his mental health concerns after making his latest movie The Son, where he plays the father of a suicidal teen.
read more on hugh jackman
His character Peter, a high-flying lawyer, falls into the same parenting traps as his father did.
Rather than trying to figure out why his son Nicholas is so depressed, Peter admonishes him for lacking ambition
But the tale does have its lighter moments too — with Peter being encouraged to carry out some highly embarrassing dad dancing by his young second wife Beth, played b Vanessa Kirby.
The couple also have to break off a steamy clinch when they are disturbed in the living room.
Most read in News TV
Of the 34-year-old actress who played Princess Margaret in The Crown, Hugh said: “I believe there isn’t a role Vanessa can’t play.
The brawny actor, who is in the midst of a six-month workout programme as he prepares to play superhero Wolverine in the next Deadpool movie, began seeing a therapist “relatively recently”.
He added: “It’s helped me a lot. With therapy, it either works for you or it doesn’t.”
He previously didn’t see the point of lying on the psychiatrist’s couch.
In Australia, which has a reputation for hard living and working out your frustrations on the sports field, there was a stigma to seeking mental health support..
Hugh, who now lives in the US, says: “There really was in Australia, for sure, ‘it’s a very American thing to do’. Whatever.”
But Hugh now realises: “You need a friend that you can unload with everything.
"You need that in all sorts of ways, from all sorts of people.
“Having someone really smart, who’s actually a little bit removed from your world, can be really helpful.
"I’ve found it really helpful.”
That’s a surprise given how well- adjusted the charismatic star has always appeared to be.
Despite his mum leaving Hugh and his siblings when they were little, he is close to Grace, who still lives in the UK.
He and his mum “made our peace” a long time ago, he says.
Seeing a therapist helped Hugh with “understanding my past and how it’s informing my thinking unconsciously.
"Getting to really understand some of the patterns I was unconsciously just repeating.”
Dad to son Oscar, 22, and daughter Ava, 17, who he adopted with wife Deborra-Lee Furness, Hugh rates himself a “solid six” as a parent.
And he sees therapy as a way of raising that score.
“Most importantly,” Hugh explains, it is “helping me to be more relational with the people I love in my life, really understanding and living in their shoes and being clear enough to be able to see them.”
Generally, he keeps Ava and Oscar out of the public eye, including on his Instagram page.
Instead, this week he has been treating his 30million social media followers to shots of him at the gym and swimming in the “freezing” sea in preparation for the Marvel movie.
He and Deadpool co-star Ryan Reynolds are close pals — but pretend to be at each other’s throats.
He said of Ryan: “He’s only 46. I’m older. But it’s not a competition.”
As part of their ongoing “feud” Hugh joked he might buy Norwich City FC just to take on Wrexham AFC, which is co-owned by Ryan.
Hugh is an honorary Norwich fan as his mum moved to the city.
Referring to Ryan and fellow actor Rob McElhenney’s takeover of the Welsh club, Hugh said during an interview: “I’m so sorry, Wrexham.
“Let’s get that game together. That’d be fun. Then maybe Ryan and I could just make it a little side wager.
“Let’s just put everything that we own and love — families, kids, everything — on the line. And let’s get Norwich playing Wrexham.”
Ryan jokily responded: “I don’t think that’s a wise idea. Hugh has the business acumen of a slug.”
Yesterday Hugh showed his romantic side by posting a Valentine’s message to actress and producer Deborra-Lee, 67, who he has been married to for 27 years.
Sharing a photo of the couple on Instagram, he wrote: “You light up the room wherever you go.
"Your humour, generosity, wisdom and spirit shines so bright.”
Despite their strong relationship, the actor has admitted that raising little ones has been “scary” for him and that he felt “desperate at times”.
Like most parents, he has found communicating with his kids hard, particularly during their teen years.
Hugh admits: “Sometimes I wish I could get inside their head and understand more what is happening or what they’re thinking or feeling.”
The Son opens in UK cinemas this week, and Hugh took his children to see it, then the family discussed it afterwards over a meal.
The film was directed and co-written by Florian Zeller, who was responsible for the highly acclaimed 2020 movie The Father, starring Anthony Hopkins and Olivia Colman.
Working on The Son made Hugh realise he needed to open up to Ava and Oscar when he was having a bad day, rather than hiding it.
He reveals: “Doing the film changed me as a parent in many ways.
“I used to think, and I was taught maybe, ‘No, you need to be strong, be there so they can lean on you’.
“(But) vulnerability is a superpower. Denying fear, worry or doubt to look strong is actually weak.
“And like a house of cards, it’s going to fall down at some point.”
Due to its difficult subject, all cast and crew of The Son were offered counselling.
The production was particularly tough on Hugh because he was working on the movie when his dad Christopher died in September 2021.
He said: “My father passed away during filming, and I think I was just confronting a lot of things as a parent, fears that you have.”
His parents had migrated from Britain to Australia as Ten Pound Poms in 1967, the year before Hugh’s birth.
After they divorced, his sisters Zoe and Sonia went to live with Grace while Hugh and his brothers Ian and Ralph were raised in Syndey by his accountant dad.
Hugh has praised Christopher for putting an emphasis on trust and honesty above financial rewards.
There seems little chance of Hugh bringing bad vibes to a set, he has done transcendental meditation since he was 20.
But his commiTment to his career means spending enough time with the family isn’t easy
In 2019 he embarked on an 88-date world tour of a stage production titled The Man. The Music. The Show.
Last month he finished a year-long stint in New York in musical The Music Man, which required 420 performances.
To make Deadpool 3 he will be in Canada for several months.
He also has a fair-trade coffee company and is involved with charitable causes, so he knows it is difficult to get the work-life balance right.
READ MORE SUN STORIES
Hugh concludes: “We get such conflicting messages in society and in culture ‘follow your dream . . . make yourself happy’.
And it’s almost impossible to know. If you ever feel like ‘I’ve got this right’, you’re probably off.”
